ocean

It is amazing to walk along the shore of the ocean, you feel how little you are and how powerful is the nature. It rains and you already don't see further than 100 meters in front of you, it gets dark and you can't take your eyes off the sky - the moon and the clouds are just perfect.

Out life is always about "too". Too much, too little, too ugly, too pretty, to selfish, too nice, too hot, too cold, too old, too young.
"too young" - apparently i am now in this category.  whatever - life goes on :) 

new books, old thoughts

I decided today that i finally need to try Koelo just to get to know what he talks about. I even don't know how to write his name correctly and didn't want to read it, cuz he is too popularized... Read one book today - he talks about very true things. I do believe in that and agree that we are making our destiny by ourselves, we need to read signs in our life and follow our dreams. He just reminded me one more time about that :)
I miss the feeling of the backpack behind my back and the cars passing by on the highway. I think i had to be born a gipsie, or maybe i used to be in a life before. I like comfort - it is cool in the hotel now, but i think it is bad when it is too comfortable - it makes you lazy and kills desire for change.
Soon, very soon the time for the new travel will come, i still have some things to do here and after i am ready to go to whatever part of the world my life will take me.

p.s. and i am thankful to this authour for the thing that he reminded - some people just prefer to dream, without making these dreams come true. I was waiting so much for the call, or e-mail, or message that will tell me  smth like "everything is allrigh, i did that". But probably you are one of the people who just want to dream...

happy happy happy happy

Wow, sometimes it takes just one thought and one call to get what you were dreaming about.

After the talks with my friends and parents and  a small depression with the symptoms of home nostalgy, i took a decision to move away from Santo Domingo. i just felt like that.

Now i am in Hard Rock Hotel, starting with 1 week trial, which also includes accommodation in the supercool room with jackuzi.
What can i say, I came here and i had the purest feeling of happiness ever - the hotel is amazing, the music makes me sing all the time, the sky is immense, the people are smiling, i can continue a loooong list of The... i just want to give a hug to the world - that is how good i feel :)

I don't know for how long it will last, wish it will be more then 1 week. but even if not, that is worth it. definately.

It is a complete change after the last week that showed to me how bad  life can play with you, trying to make you stronger every day.  Last week tought me lessons that people don't learn in the universities, i needed it, i am sure. I feel like i have read a book about a life story, the only difference is that it was real.  I am very worried that i don't have enough power to change a lot of things yet. but i am working on it ;) and i need to hurry up, because in 18 days i will be 22 already...

searching

14 months. Or 1 year, 2 months and 2 days in Dominican Republic, or wonderland as many people tend to call this country. I think I am truly discovering myself here. I remember that in the childhood I wanted to be 1 day astronaut, another day – diver, another day – singer, another day – somebody else. I never had any single profession of a dream. I wanted it all. Try everything, a piece of each thing – good and bad. Later on I grew up, but nothing really changed in this direction. Couple of years ago I was thinking how cool it would be to live the life travelling from one country to another (cuz we have more than 200 in the world!!), or how cool it would be to try all the professions or at least as many as possible (and we have thousands!!).

Now I am doing something like that. In a weird way. Some of the friends already advised me to go to psychologist, but I don’t think that it is a solution. Maybe I am doing wrong, maybe I just need to settle and find “normal job”, and finally make my parents happy. But I am not ready for it yet, and I don’t know if I will ever be ready. I want to know life as it is. I want to keep exploring, I want to realize the project that I have started, cuz I already can picture it easily in the future, and It is like my baby, it means a lot to me. During these 2 months of the independent life I discovered more than in 4 years of the uni.  I worked in a call center - never thought I will.  I tried myself as a teacher, and I  actually enjoyed it a loooot – it is incredible feeling when all those little creatures in a small clothes are running to you and screaming “teacher, teacher”, I think I can do it for the rest of my life. I even worked one night as a bar tender and this is supercool – and “si dios quiere” I will continue.

I met a lot a good people – people with big dreams and great heart. I met strange people – types of personalities that I have never met before. I met mean and hypocrite people. I love meeting people, and listening to their life stories, and with the project and the change of jobs it goes with a double speed.

Sometimes I get the feeling that it is a time to move on(especially when the parents a friends are starting to tell it) but then I look back and: no, that would be too easy just to give up, through to trash the idea and 2 months of work and find an internship in a comfortable country. I know that The Real Thing will work, I just need to be patient and as the song says “if you want it, it will come” ;)

P.S. and yes, Zona Colonial is a special place, it just makes my heart smile